• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • Home
  • About Our Story
  • Prayer Requests
  • Resources
  • Coaching Discovery Call
  • Disclosure Statement

The Joyous Family

Sober on Purpose For His Purpose

  • Family
  • Faith
  • Travel
  • Money
  • Recovery

August 21, 2018 By Tanya Gioia Leave a Comment · This post may contain affiliate links

How To Make An Easy Step 8 Amends List

In making an amends list, we review our humble willingness to make a real life change. Just like Step 4, Step 8 requires putting pen to paper.  Making the Amends List is separate from actually making amends to people you have harmed.

What is the difference between “making an amends” and saying “I am sorry”?

I am sorry–a sincere apology is part of an amends though not enough.

Making an amends–an effort by apology and action to restore goodwill to a broken relationship.

As people suffering from hurts, habits, and hang-ups, we have said I am sorry hundreds of times.  Often truly meaning it.  This step takes action on the “I’m sorry” words by asking those we have hurt how we can make it right?

An Amends List Addresses Our Specific Responsibilities to Our Personal Relationships

Asking God to remove your character defects clears the dust out of your eyes so that you can see your part in the situations.  Shedding the denial allows you to honestly look at those you have hurt and those who have hurt you.

Do to others as you would have them do to you. Luke 6:31

This moves us out of ourselves into how to “right” a relationship with others according to God’s word.  We are rebuilding our character.  Proving to ourselves, God and those we harmed how serious we are about reestablishing the integrity that our addiction stole from us.

Magic Amends List Work Sheet

At this point just making the list completes Step 8.  Don’t make it hard!

Based on my sponsor’s ideas, I made a simple Magic Amends Making List Step 8

Fill it out however it suits you.  Take out Step 4 worksheets and jot down the names and/or notes on who you need to actively seek out to actively repair a relationship within your life.

Use the three columns:

  • People I am Ready to Make an Amends to Now.
  • People I Maybe Ready To Make an Amends to Later.
  • People I Don’t Know If I Will Ever Be Ready to Make an Amends To.

Or there is an app for that!  Try this link to a phone app for making and Amends List.

Tracking your amends list in a journal also helps.  My favorite at the moment is the Wonder Journal.  this lets you keep everything in one place.  Use the Magic Amends Making List inside the Wonder Journal to keep it organized and ready for when you are ready to make the amends.

As Jerry mentioned in the video. Show your list to your sponsor, pray about it, think through what might and might not happen.  The Amends List is just that, a list.  Wait on God for the timing to move into Step 9.

Colorful Step Make an Amends List

Sneak Preview–Types of Amends

Direct Amends

It takes great courage to take personal responsibly for your actions speaking directly to the person you have harmed. Open honest communication about your actions, plus, listening to the concerns of the other person are required. Finding a solution for the damage you caused in the other person’s life, may involve service, replacement of the stolen item, reimbursement, or another action that repairs the harm.  Talking over this action with your sponsor is a good idea.

Indirect Amends

What if the person or organization you harmed has died or no longer exists? Or, the person will not accept your amends?  Then it is time to roll up your sleeves and get to work in an organization that helps others.  Service, donation or even creation of a product that will serve others offers a way to repair the damage that can’t be reversed or undone.

Look for ways to be the light in a hurting person’s life.

Living Amends

Repent in Biblical terms means to turn away from sin and turn toward God.  A living amends is just that–turning away from the actions that harmed the relationship and turning to God for the actions that make beautiful relationships.

Living amends, especially in families, requires a genuine lifestyle change.  Turning from anger to constructive problem solving between husband and wife will change the mood of the entire family. Choosing to manage money and emotions rather than ranting and blaming causes peace.

The Living Amends is the hardest of the amends because of the daily nature. The Living Amends is the most rewarding. Your family and friends will notice!

 

 

Begin the Joyous Journey

1 step one guide 1

12 colorful pages to match each of the 12 Steps to Recovery.

We will send you one a week for 12 weeks.

Pin them up everywhere as a joyful reminder that you are worth it!

Thank you for choosing recovery!

Love the One Day At A Time Family

the joyous family logo

Just one more Step!

There was an error submitting your subscription. Please try again.

We won't send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time. Powered by ConvertKit

Share this:

  • Tweet
Summary
How To Make An Easy Step 8 Amends List
Article Name
How To Make An Easy Step 8 Amends List
Description
In making an amends list we review our humble willingness to make real life change. Just like Step 4, Step 8 requires putting pen to paper.  Making the Amends List is separate from actually making the amends to people you have harmed.
Author
Tanya Gioia
Publisher Name
The Joyous Family
Publisher Logo
The Joyous Family
Share the love...
Share on Facebook Share
Share on Twitter Tweet
Share on Google Plus Share
Share on Pinterest Share
Share on Stumbleupon Share
Send email Mail

Filed Under: Blog, Recovery Tagged With: addiction, addiction and kids, Codependency, Freedom from Addiction

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • YouTube

ConvertKit Form

Young Woman Punching Young Male Wearing Red Boxing Gloves

How to Pray for your Addict Husband

I am Not My Addiction

I am Not My Addiction: God Says I Am

Valentine's Day Prayer Challenge: Prayers For Your Husband

Valentine’s Day Prayer Challenge: Prayers For Your Husband

financial habits savvy women proverbs 31 debt free invest

5 Positively Powerful Financial Habits of a Woman of Valor

ConvertKit Form

Begin the Joyous Journey

1 step one guide 1

12 colorful pages to match each of the 12 Steps to Recovery.

We will send you one a week for 12 weeks.

Pin them up everywhere as a joyful reminder that you are worth it!

Thank you for choosing recovery!

Love the One Day At A Time Family

the joyous family logo

Just one more Step!

There was an error submitting your subscription. Please try again.

We won't send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time. Powered by ConvertKit

Why Don’t They Just Quit – Book

Buy Now →

Categories

Footer

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy

Categories

Search

Copyright © 2019 · Brunch Pro & The Genesis Framework · Design by Stephanie Jones

Share on Facebook Share
Share on Twitter Tweet
Share on Google Plus Share
Share on Pinterest Share
Share on Stumbleupon Share
Send email Mail
Share this
X
Share this
Subject:
Message:
Ajax loader